Renting an Apartment – 1940

Versão em português no final. Btw, 50 mil réis = R$18 +/- today

Screen Shot 2014-07-06 at 4.28.37 PM

An Apartment for Sale by Lucia Benedetti
RdS, January 20 1940

Scenario: The front of an apartment building, with a hanging sign at the entrance that says: “FOR SALE 1 APARTMENT”. A customer (C) talks with the manager (M), solicitious and a flatterer.

M – You haven’t factored in everything. Since I’ve been in charge here, there’s been no empty apartments…Everything is renting like crazy…Also due to the prices!

C – Ok, well…the apartment is kind of small, but it’s not all bad…

M – Bad? It’s great, splendid! And the location? Excellent. Tram 10 minutes away, bus, 20…And the price? Very low!

C – Very low?

M – 200 mil réis, fees aside…

C – 200 mil rés, fees aside. Yeah…that’s not bad. 200 mil réis…

M – And fees…

C – So about 50 mil réis in fees…

M – 50 mil réis for building upkeep. But it’s nothing.

C – Yes, of course. 50 mil réis for the upkeep of the elevator…

M – With the elevator, 50 more…

C – 50 more?

M – But it’s an advantage. You understand, who’s going to want to climb the stairs to the 6th floor multiple times per day? No one. That’s why there’s an elevator. No one could handle such exercise…

C – Yeah…it’s too much for one’s legs…

M – Comfort is everything, my friend. Everything. It’s worth it to pay 50 more than to have legs that hurt, swollen feet…

C – And cruches cost a lot now.

M – Yeah. The cost of cruches went up a lot due to the war.

C – Agreed. And…is there a lot of water?

M – Wha…it gushes out of the faucets. It never runs out here. The whole neighborhood comes to get water here. An incredible abundance!

C – Great! Great! There’s nothing more comforting than a good bath…

M – Bath included, another 50 mil réis…

C – But that’s crazy! 50 mil réis to take a bath?

M – But…and what about your comfort? And the cleaning? Aren’t they worth it?

C – Yeah…With the heat one can’t get through it without a bath…I’m liking the apartment more and more. It has a nice view, there from the balcony…

M – With a balcony, that’s another 50.

C – Another 50?

M – Fees…The city government is very jealous now of its landscape. We have to defend ourselves…More and more it’s worth it, after dinner, sitting in a lounge chair and looking out over the sea, the boats, the sunset…

C – The sunset is free?

M – Yes. A bonus.

C – My wife loves sunsets…

M – Being married, another 50.

C – But you think that I’d need a 2 bedroom apartment and a living room if I were single? That’s a good one! I’m married, yes sir! Legally and religiously! Look at that!…You thought I didn’t have a wife, huh?

M – There’s a lot of single lads around here. They pay less, it’s true. But also, it’s not something to praise. Just another 50 mil réis…

C – Just another 50 mil réis…Well, with another 50 I can buy two pairs of shoes for my kids!

M – You have kids?

C – I have 2…

M – Boys?

C – A boy and a girl. Not to brag, but they’re very intelligent. The oldest is 6 and already knows how to read. The youngest is 3 and sings on the radio. It’s a delight…

M – They really are smart. At 6 I only knew how to ask for candy and make trouble…With kids, another 50 mil réis.

C – Another 50?

M – That’s right because it’s you and you already said it’s a boy and a girl. If it were two boys, the fee would be higher: 100 mil réis…

C – 100 mil réis? But why is that?

M – Vital space!

C – My lord…My wife is going to have another baby by the year’s end…and I don’t know if it will be a boy or girl…

M – While the stork has yet to arrive, you’ll just pay 30 mil réis more…

C – Before it’s born? That’s absurd!

M – Look at the advantages before complaining. Moving, you’re going to want to bring your wife, right?

C – Of course.

M – And doesn’t she like the sunset?

C – She loves it.

M – So then? It’s happiness that you give her. In this delicate state, women should be treated with much affection. She will be content and the little one will be born healthy and happy…

C – Thinking twice, ok…

M – So, you agree…

C – I’m kind of alarmed. Adding it all up how much is it?

M – 200…300…400…450…500…550…600…680. 680.

C – And the contract?

M – Look, don’t worry about the contract…It’s for three years, at least. But in general those who come here never leave. They stay the rest of their life. However, the timeline isn’t important.

C – I have a good co-signer…

M – Congrats. It’s hard to find one these days. But we don’t like co-signers. We prefer deposits.

C – A deposit? And…and…how much is that?

M – Two and a half years of rent as a deposit isn’t asking that much, is it?

C – It could be more. Five years, six…

M – Exactly. But we ask for just two and a half years in advance because we have other small demands. Things of little importance, you’ll see…

C – Yeah? Like what?

M – For example, if you wanted to move somehwere else…

C – Another 50 mil réis…

M – No…quite wrong…Nothing like that. We just would want you to leave the apartment as clean as it was when you got here. With a recent paint job, clean windows, brand new faucets, spotless floor, walls without nail marks, repainted stove, bathroom perfect…

C – Bright ceiling, doors without stains, in effect, everything perfect as if I had entered one day and left the next.

M – Perfect. You understand. All this kills us financially. There are 300 apartments here. If it would be necessary to fix them all, rent money wouldn’t go to anything else…

C – You’re right…

M – So you’ll take the apartment?

C – No. I’m going to make an amusing story of it.

I0000123-02PX=000000PY=000000 (clique 2x para ler em português)

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s